Doubt

I am starting to feel what is going inside my tummy. It is not bad but I know with in a few days it will be very uncomfortable. I have been on a roller coaster of emotions the last few days. One minute I am feeling great and positive it will be my turn. The next minute I am in tears because I am afraid it won't work once again.

This morning I woke up with a lot of doubt. I am so used to my life the way it is I almost can't even imagine a life being pregnant or having a child. I have been making tentative plans for the summer and thinking of all I want to do that I couldn't if I am pregnant. I have my heart set on that it will not work. All I can do is trust that God will lead me on my journey to parenthood whatever that may be. I hope I can stay positive during all this but right now, I am not feeling it.

I have my CD9 ultra sound Thursday which will give me a better idea of the expected retrieval. I sure hope this works because I AM SICK OF THIS!